Random Thoughts on Movement and Living Well

  This blog has been simmering for a while.  My twisty thoughts have been taking longer than usual to unravel.  You might guess that by that mambo-sized title….how will I ever wrap all that into one blog and make it positive? I am not sure but I do know this, I always do my best to listen to my heart and do what my gut says because I hate regret and I try to avoid it at all costs….more on that later….I hope!  So, here goes!  My last blog was pre-Boston, which is almost two months ago.  I have packed lot of life into a few weeks......two birthdays,  all of Thanksgiving and Christmas tradition. I have cared for and planned for it all and it has been wonderful.   I have either been in high gear getting things done or just the opposite, which is a completely unproductive and melted-mind state. By the way, unproductive is perfectly okay, healthy, and good to do, which is hard to see unless you have a healthy mental state. Now that my busy personal ti...

  Would You Rather?  This game was made for me, I love it!!…along with just asking random weird questions…like, I wonder why…? On this eve of running the Boston marathon, I was thinking about the last three years since I qualified.   It should have been about a year and a half between my qualifier and Boston but you know we had this pandemic thing. When Boston 2020 was cancelled, about a month before the race, I felt I was ready. I had just run my first 20 miler of that cycle and I was feeling great. I had killed that run with the help of a friend.   It was my fastest 20-mile training run on record, I believe.   A few days later, the news came.   No Boston. So we waited and reset for fall 2020. I didn’t restart my cycle until about the latest time possible as I thought it was going to be cancelled again.   I had built up but not really in earnest because I was getting mentally worn down after the first reset already.   It was cancelled again in ...

My "Why" goes back to another topical question, "How did you get started running?".  I recently was honored to be asked if I would be interested in writing a "Why I Run" for @themotherrunners and while thinking about how I was going to start it, I realized that I had never really written a "Why I run" piece and I decided it might be a nice blog.  The answer is simple and it did not take a lot of thinking to point to my "why', but it took time to think about how to make my point come across in as few words as possible. My "why" is history.  I started running in 7th grade when my dad started running around the lake we lived on.  I picked it up because in all the games I played with the neighbors and my brothers, the running part was my favorite part and it was about all that I was good at....I was not good at batting, catching, throwing, shooting baskets, you name it....but in all those games, I loved running and I loved being ou...

Celebrating success in a recovery process is especially important...it is a long haul and I know I always feel like I still have so far to go so it can become overwhelming and self-defeating to only look forward. I was thinking about celebrating some achievements today and then I realized doing that is a bit like gratitude practice....sometimes it is easy, sometimes it is hard, but it is always good and it is always especially needed when it is the most difficult. Just an FYI, this is one of the few times that you will see me include some numbers in eating disorder-related writing. Numbers are not helpful in the recovery scene so please forgive this one time. After thinking about what I am celebrating, I realized that it was a good weekend to do it. I had read a book on Labor Day weekend in 2019 that was pivotal in helping me to see that I had more than an energy availability problem or RED-s. So, today I looked at some of my earlier writing and I saw that September 6 was also a big da...

Whether we are hiking or driving, we know that there is a shorter and steeper way to a summit or a longer more gradual way up to the same summit. This is not a dissertation on geometry but a reflection on goals...for example if the summit is the goal, we all might have different paths to the summit and actually we may make the inevitable additional goals along the way.  On the journey, we may have to realign or change the goals...but always keep an eye on the summit. Recently, I was having a hard time fully embracing my latest goals for my next marathon. I know full well what they are and what they should be.....I just don't especially like them but I want to love them. I am full of self-doubt about my fitness and afraid of what might happen to rain on my parade. Underlying all of this self-doubt, fear and goal-waffling, is the eating disorder. It talks and says, "See, it is not a food problem. See, eating has not helped you, in fact you are running worse. See, your body/joint...

When does something healthy become disordered?   " Our time, attention and energy are limited.The more passionate we become about any one pursuit, the less of ourselves we have to offer to everything else....You simply cannot be deeply passionate and balanced in combination. The roots of passion, prevent it.....Living with passion is, by definition, living without balance."  From the book The Passion Paradox by Brad Stulberg and Steve Magness In my opinion, the answer to that question is found in asking oneself more questions…….passion is good but there is a fine line between passionate and addicted.   Is the activity taking lots of head space and thoughts?  C an you turn thoughts about the activity off?   Is it mentally distracting from other activities people, or work?   Is it taking substantial time away from higher priorities? Is it making you a better or more pleasant person to be around….or the opposite?  Is  it life-giving or is it drai...

All or Nothing is Not Always the Right Approach In college, I took a lot of speech classes. I am an introvert and a data geek so I thought it would be helpful for career purposes. Debate was probably one of the most useful classes, other than my accounting classes, that I took during my four years at IU.  Every topic that we debated, we had to debate both sides.  At first, I thought it was going to be so difficult to argue both sides of an issue. As it turned out, I discovered that it was not challenging at all to argue both sides (and that was even before the internet). Virtually every topic had pros and cons, so debating each side was not that difficult.  That class taught me such a valuable life lesson. It taught me that nearly every topic and argument that exists has two sides. It taught me that because of that, striking common ground is invaluable. It of course required that we debate or argue based on facts, not based on opinions.  This of course was also a val...